Sample may contain unsuitable content.
Audiobook streaming provided by:
Share this book:
AuthorJane Fallon
NarratorZoe Telford
Duration12h 2m
CategoriesAdult Fiction, Romance, Humour and Comedy
PublisherPenguin Books Ltd
VersionUnabridged
Penguin presents the audiobook edition of Getting Rid of Matthew by Jane Fallon, read by Zoe Telford.
What to do if Matthew, your secret lover of the past four years, finally decides to leave his wife Sophie and their two daughters and move into your flat, just when you're thinking that you might not want him anymore . . .
PLAN A: Stop shaving your armpits. And your bikini line. Tell him you have a moustache that you wax every six weeks. Stop having sex with him. Pick holes in the way he dresses. Don't brush your teeth. Or your hair. Or pluck out the stray hag-whisker that grows out of your chin. Buy incontinence pads and leave them lying around.
PLAN B: Accidentally on purpose bump into his wife Sophie. Give yourself a fake name and identity. Befriend Sophie. Actually begin to really like Sophie. Snog Matthew's son (who's the same age as you by the way. You're not a paedophile). Buy a cat and give it a fake name and identity. Befriend Matthew's children. Unsuccessfully. Watch your whole plan go absolutely horribly wrong.
Getting Rid of Matthew is the sharp and hilariously funny novel from Jane Fallon.
Author: Jane Fallon
Author Jane Fallon
Narrator Claire Sturgess
Duration 8h 51m
Best friends Holly and Roz tell each other everything. So when Holly gets a shot at her dream job after putting everything on hold to raise her daughter, she assumes Roz will be waiting to pop the champagne. But is she just imagining things or is Roz not quite as happy as she should be? And now she thinks about it, a few things don't quite add up.....
View BookThe Woman Who Went To Bed For A Year
Author: Sue Townsend
Author Sue Townsend
Narrator Caroline Quentin
Duration 10h 26m
The day her children leave home, Eva climbs into bed and stays there. She's had enough-of her kids' carelessness, her husband's thoughtlessness and of the world's general indifference. Brian can't believe his wife is doing this. Who is going to make dinner? But Eva won't budge; and soon she realises to her horror that everyone has been taking her f...
View BookAuthor: Sue Townsend
Author Sue Townsend
Narrator Angela Thorne
Duration 7h 24m
When a Republican party wins the General Election, they strip the royal family of everything and send them to live on a housing estate in the Midlands. Exchanging caviar for boiled eggs, servants for a social worker named Trish, the Queen and her family learn what it means to be poor among the great unwashed. Is their breeding sufficient to allow t...
View BookAuthor: P.G. Wodehouse
Author P.G. Wodehouse
Narrator Various
Duration 2h 28m
Bertie Wooster looks pretty stylish in his new Tyrolean hat - or so he thinks: others, notably Jeeves, disagree. But when Bertie embarks on an errand of mercy to Totleigh Towers, things get quickly out of control and he's going to need all the help Jeeves can provide. There are good eggs present, such as Gussie Fink-Nottle and the Rev. 'Stinker' Pi...
View BookComing Home To the Comfort Food Cafe
Author: Debbie Johnson
Author Debbie Johnson
Narrator Madeleine Hyland
Duration 9h 8m
Moving to the little village of Budbury, Zoe hopes the crisp Dorset sea breeze and gentle pace of life will be a fresh start for her and her goddaughter, Martha. Luckily for them both, the friendly community at the caf‚ provide listening ears, sage advice, shoulders to cry on and some truly excellent carrot cake. And when Martha's enigmatic,...
View BookSummer At the Comfort Food Cafe
Author: Debbie Johnson
Author Debbie Johnson
Narrator Dawn Murphy
Duration 9h 50m
The Comfort Food Cafe is perched on a windswept clifftop at what feels like the edge of the world, serving up the most delicious cream teas, beautifully baked breads and carefully crafted cupcakes. For tourists and locals alike, the ramshackle cafe overlooking the beach is a beacon of laughter, companionship and security - a place like no other, a...
View BookAuthor: Trisha Ashley
Author Trisha Ashley
Narrator Julia Barrie
Duration 12h 30m
Fall in back in love with life in this gripping listen about fate and second chances. The eagerly awaited new novel from the Sunday Times best-selling author. Thirty-year-old Izzy Sweetwell has a peaceful life. She lives in the sleepy village of Halfhidden with her aunt with her aunt Debo, who runs the local kennels, a home from home for waifs and...
View BookAuthor: Jane Fallon
Author Jane Fallon
Narrator Kristin Atherton
Duration 11h 44m
Brought to you by Penguin. Top ten bestselling author Jane Fallon looks at discovering secrets and the price of keeping them in her stunning new novel, Skeletons.All Jen had ever wanted was a big, happy family. And when she married Jason and became part of the Masterson clan that's exactly what she got. For years everything was perfect.But then Jen...
View BookAuthor: Jane Fallon
Author Jane Fallon
Narrator Various
Duration 12h 17m
Tamsin and her best friend Michelle have been inseparable since they were teenagers. Even now they spend all their time together, along with Patrick, Michelle's handsome husband. So when Tamsin hears a rumour that Patrick is having an affair, she is furious and plots a scheme to catch him in the act, using her assistant Bea as live-bait. It should...
View BookNursery Crime Series Book 2: The Fourth Bear
Author: Jasper Fforde
Author Jasper Fforde
Narrator Luke Thompson
SeriesNursery Crime, Book 2
Duration 11h 5m
The Gingerbreadman: Psychopath, murderer, and biscuit is loose in the streets of Reading. He and Mary Mary have been reassigned due to falling levels of nursery crime. That is, until a chance encounter during the Armitage Shanks literary awards at the oddly familiar Deja-Vu Club lead Jack and Mary on the hunt for missing journalist Henrietta 'Goldi...
View Book